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Sometimes...Sometimes, a heart must be broken.
Sometimes, harsh words must be spoken.
Sometimes, from dreams we are woken
To find life's not a-jokin'.
Sometimes, our choices are bad.
Sometimes, we lose what we had.
Sometimes, while we are sad
We forget how to be glad
Yet sometimes, after we've fussed
Sometimes, despite the cost
Sometimes, even when lost
We find solace and trust
And sometimes, grey skies do turn blue
Sometimes, we can start anew
Sometimes, our dreams will come true
Yes.. sometimes, even for you
So when there are signs
That you've come on hard times
Hold these words in your minds
Because sometimes... sometimes...
Happy Howloween!In fevered pitch
I groan and twitch
As pain bestrides
My body's width
With maw outstretched
I yowl and wretch
A grizzly sight
A sickening stench
Then burning rage,
My mind: deranged!
The final stage;
A beastly being
A moonlit scene...
Say, what am I,
Smoker's RebuffI knew a bloke
Who loved to smoke
His throat was black as death
He was told
His life was sold
For less than it was worth
To this he said
Let's not pretend
I know how I will die
But ye who hold fast to the last will you ever know why?
Said the Politician to His DaughterThe world of politics my dear,
Is a dog eat dog world.
A rat race in a nest of vipers
For the slow, we toll the bell.
You'll be a fish out of water
Jumping into a different kettle of fish
Take this advice my dear daughter
If you don't have a death wish
You must be a wolf in sheep's clothing
And must never bark up the wrong tree
Your plans must be dark horses
If they are to become policy
Beware of the elephant in the room
And the gift horse, as a matter of fact
Because even our Kangaroo courts
Know just how to skin a cat
We are lions led by donkeys
Who all spew weasel words
It's a dog and pony show, child
This false game of shepherds
So if you want to be voted in
Be sure to flog all the dead horses
Cast your pearls before swine
Lend rabbit ears, to mice' voices
It's an animal kingdom out there
Take no prisoners if you can
For such is the place where hatched
Are the best laid plans of mice and man
A Sense of ForebodingIn a chair; inclined
I have sat; many times
Listening to stories of
Our leaders' crimes
'Bout heights; they should've sought
'Bout rights; we should've got
'Bout problems upon problems that
Our leaders wrought
Till I tire; of this listening
And retire; to my rooming
Seeking relief from
A sense of foreboding
Ah! La GalaOmo mehn, this traffic na die
My belle wan kill me why!?
E don te, wey I dey try
Commot for here; traffic na die
Go slow slow, dey go go slower
Since I chop don pass eight hour
I no vex, I no get power
Abeg nau, make I buy Gala
-ala, gala. Gala, gala, gala, ga-
Na so dem dey shout from far
Biko bienu reach my car
Abeg nau, make I buy Ga-
-ala gala. Gala, gala, gala, ga-
Fifty naira only ba?
Bring your money, praise Allah!
For your -ala Gala, gala, ga-
To Make a Vehicle Fly1-bump, 2-bump, 3-bumps shy
What does it take to make a vehicle fly?
How many speed bumps do you count?
How many potholes on this route?
4-bumps, 5-bumps, 6-bumps high
What does it take to make a vehicle fly
Up above the clear blue sky?
What does it take to make a vehicle fly?
7-bumps, 8-bumps, 9-bumps chai!
Why did we try to make a vehicle fly?
Turned right over! My oh my!
Now there's a vehicle on its side
Cracks in the TarHis eyes dart quickly
From the left to the right
As he moves though the night
With some near, some afar
Some thin: like a scar
Some deep as a gorge
Some too hard to forge
He swerves down the pike
With the zeal of a tyke
Staying true to his sight
And the beams of headlights
'Tis hard to be sure
While he darts evermore
Passing many a car
Dodging cracks in the tar
Hokey PokeyFirst there was one
Which then became three
As the first came to love
The rest came to be
There was Loki
And Jokey the swift
But by no lee
Were they simply
An uneven motif
For Loki scared the most
And yet Poky was a lover
While Poky spoke the least
And yet said more than they ever..
Still neither was quite present
Even when they were together
For Poky hid with Jokey
When Loki was a terror
And Jokey hid with Loki
When Poky was a-pleasure
And wouldn't you know that only Jokey really loved to play?
So Poky hid with Loki
When Jokey was a player!
See Jokey loved to play
While Poky loved to sway
And Loki he just lost his cool
Being lonely everyday
So when Hokey met with Loki and drove his loneliness away
Thus began a Low key Hokey Poky Jokey day!
A Pirate-y LimerickThere once was a pirate named Jack
who was always told he had a knack
for drinking all the rum,
‘specially when he was glum,
until he got stabbed in the back.
Cute LimerickA cat and mouse live in my house
and I each day they tend to rouse,
chasing each other all around
waking me with fighting sounds,
but never do wake up my spouse.
Batting EyelashesShe batted her eyelashes.
Literally, she did.
They were so long
and incredibly stiff!
She batted her eyelashes.
Really, she did.
Coated in mascara,
they packed a hard hit!
She batted her eyelashes.
Honestly, she did.
Scoring home runs...
Talent or trick?
*Nursery Slopes*High against skyline blue
Snowy mountains welcome you
Ski lift rotates do take a seat
Winter clothing looking neat.
To the top in snowy style
Riding lift for short while
Admiring scenery as I go
Stately passage rather slow.
Deposited at the very top
Skies and poles in tangled drop
Sorted out, lump in throat
This no longer snowy joke.
Wonderful view, mountain high
Mittened hand touches sky
Now I have to ski back down
Bravery needed, courage found.
Practising a brand new skill
Snowplow down mighty hill
Zoom to left, zoom to right
Feeling confident, goodbye fright.
Rosy cheeks, medal I get
Experience never forget
Glühwein toast feeling fine
Memory stands test of time.
The Modeler's LamentIt’s Christmas time! A time of joy!
A time to buy and quake,
For I have bought my model “toy”
And it is time to make!
The box was so seductive,
And my ideas were so productive
The plastic was oh so sexy,
And the parts were oh so complexy.
Instruction whispered in my ear;
“C’mon, try me, have no fear.”
The wife, she found me in the bed,
With the packaging pillowed my head
And as I shuffled to the couch,
My shoulders hung low in a slouch,
I vowed to glue my styrene mistress
Let no mere marriages belay my interests
With glue and putty I’ll set to work!
Why, I’ll win that contest with a smirk!
A master craftsman I’ll show to them,
My artistry, they shall not condemn!
With brass and aftermarket it will shine with fire
They’ll bow to me and perspire
With 30x mag, I’ll paint their eyebrows
That’ll show those styrene highbrows!
I’ll laugh with glee, just they wait and see!
For thirty years I’ve been a
A Ditty to the WittyAre you clever on your feet?
Can you stand on your head?
Can you sit on a whoopee cushion,
making no sound?
O this is a ditty,
dedicated to the witty-
a thousand times its said!
For those witty ditty clever people,
standing on their head.
leyghan: A LimerickThere was a young lady called leyghan
Who decided to build her own ray-gun.
But when you go out to play
Always point it away...
Two months later, the trauma is fadin'.
Late Night CerealShe texted me to ask for milk,
A query so surreal,
For she was of the hungry ilk
Who craved for cereal.
Alas, I had no milk but soy,
Which she was wary to deploy
Within her bowl,
Within her bowl,
Her face showed she did not taste joy.
Oh Special K! 'Twas not the day
She meant for you to swim
With Mister Two-Percent, and play
Your tasty games with him.
The box was done, your final breath
Could only end in runny death.
A soggy grave was all she left.
All times, both good and bad, must end
In peacefulness or pain.
One moment, by your side a friend,
The next, gone and estranged.
While we still live, let's take control,
Together, let's live to the full
Like milk and flakes,
Like milk and flakes,
Creamy, crunchy in the bowl.
Pranks★ Make vanilla pudding. Put it in a mayo jar. Eat it in public.
★ Hire two private investigators and get them to follow each other.
★ Get into a crowded elevator and say "I bet you're all wondering why I gathered you here today."
★ Buy a parrot and teach it to say "Help! I've been turned into a parrot!"
★ Dip some cotton balls in water, they'll stick to anything on a cold night...
★ Sprinkle some salt on your victim's toothbrush. When this person goes to brush their teeth, he or she will get a salty tasted treat.
★ If you know someone who turns on the shower before actually entering the tub area. Then before their next shower, turn the shower head so it faces outside the shower area. Most people don't even look up before turning the nozzle.
★ Glue a bottle of shampoo to the shower shelf (to avoid damage, use clear caulk on a surface that can be scraped).
A Colourful StoryThey once called me quark, for I was well red
Then I met Kate - and she turned my head
So I spent more time greening, than a flower bed
I thought I was happy, but I was misled
My smiling soon ended, when she turned me blue
For Kate had been cheating! Yes cheating, with hue
Always, she had rushed to her phone when it rang
Always... to hear that bastard's british twang
A colourful fellow, his hair quite unkempt
His skin strangely yellow, I question descent
In tinted bifocals, white suit, and pink tie
He looked me once over; I gave him, a black eye
PetalsThe grass tickled between her toes as her father toiled away with the roses by the letterbox. She watched his fingers weave between the thorns to pat the soil around each bush, humming to some John Lennon song she couldn't put a name to. Despite the sun just tipping the horizon, she saw sweat prickling his brow and his eyes squinting against the light. The fine lines on his face were suddenly accentuated by shadow, and for a moment, she swelled with wonder.
'Maria, come here,' he said, waving her over. 'You're not going to learn anything sitting all the way over there.'
Excitement sparked her limbs into motion, and she crawled over to sit next to him, careful to tuck her skirt beneath her thighs to avoid the dirt.
He picked up a pair of clippers from beside him. 'Now, you need to snipe back these diseased parts here and there from the base of the plant. It helps it grow better.'
Snipping off two pieces of wood with ease, he deposited them in Maria's outstretched hand. Their rough textu
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^Nyx-Valentine arrived in our community and started whipping everyone into a frenzy with her relentless desire to bring the Artistic Nude and Fetish galleries to the fore. 9 years later, and it's safe to say that Nyx is not only a leader as a photographer in these galleries, but she has also established herself as a much saught after model. ^... Read More